The Dos And Don'ts When Looking For Your Serious Relationship

Sometimes the older we get, the harder it seems to meet the right person. So much time is spent these days on online dating that people have almost forgotten how to be honest about themselves when they come face to face on a date with an actual person. Here are some tips to get you back in the game.

Relationship help Do

You have your eyes on someone and would like to get together with them. Instead of concentrating your energies into getting them, use that time and energy to make them want you instead. Remember that if you think that they’re so fabulous, chances are other people do too. Your job is not to try to join the pack and vie for their attention, but to concentrate on making yourself the person that stands out from all the rest of suitors.

Do keep an air of mystery. Don’t let it all fly out the first time you meet someone you think you may be interested in. This bores them. Let them want to meet you again to find out more. Let them have questions about who you are and what you do, to wonder about you when they’re at work, in the park, at the gym. Let them feel a smile coming on when they think about finding out more and more about you.

Invest in yourself. When all is said and done, even if you don’t succeed in finding a good relationship, your investment stays with you and you lose nothing. Learn a new language, take up an interesting game, join a gym, volunteer at a centre, go back to school etc. All of these things make you more attractive to the opposite sex.

Do keep an open mind, your good-looking, intelligent, popular, ideal person, may just be intelligent and average looking. However, if your mind is locked on false notions, you’re in danger of letting your soul-mate and parent of your future children slip out of your hands, and while you’re scouring the earth in futility ten years from now, he/she would be making someone else happy instead of you.

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Monique August 28, 2008 at 6:05 PM  

Some solid advice, but too late for me. No man would look at me twice anymore unless they are well over sixty


Liane Schmidt September 7, 2008 at 6:50 PM  

Great post!

Best wishes.


-Liane Schmidt.

p.s. for Monique... true love is timeless *:)

Leigh Russell September 10, 2008 at 2:07 PM  

The man of your dreams... as you say, a lot depends on what the dream is. Sometimes people obsess over superficial qualities. You can't really know about love until you've been living together for at least 30 years, by which time most of the qualities you dreamed about have begun to sag... one way or another... but something else, and altogether amazing, has evolved from a lifetime shared. In my opinion.

Anne Lyken-Garner September 10, 2008 at 6:06 PM  

Thanks Monique, Liane and Leigh. Your contributions mean a lot to me.

Anne Lyken-Garner September 10, 2008 at 6:26 PM  

Monique, unless that picture isn't you. I think that you're an attractive woman.

Consider this a smack on the hand for being so nasty to a beautiful, talented script writer.


Anne Lyken-Garner is a published author, editor and freelance writer. Her specialities include relationships and confidence building. You can find her inspirational memoir here.
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