Facebook: Breaking Relationship Boundaries

Is Facebook breaking relationship boundariesSince the birth of social media, relationships have become defined by the way in which those in a relationship conduct themselves online. No site has created more of an impact than Facebook. While couples have the option of officiating their relationship with a Facebook declaration, they can also fall victim to the perils that come with snooping. Thanks to several Facebook features that allow users to chronologically categorise their relationship and snoop on their significant other, the social networking site has begun to break several relationship boundaries. 
A guest post by Neil Keifer

Facebook: Breaking Relationship Boundaries

Defining Relationships With a Social Network

Today, it is not unusual for a couple to be questioned over why they have not made their relationship 'Facebook official'. To some, the idea of officiating their relationship through the use of Facebook is ridiculous. For others, it is an absolute necessity that determines whether or not the other person is serious about them. This can become problematic; if one person feels uncomfortable with an official declaration of love for the benefit of the rest of the world, and the other views it as being a way to establish trust, arguments can soon erupt. Regardless of how important a change in status is for those who are in a couple, other Facebook features have made snooping and spying easy.

Facebook Stalking

Closely following the idea that you can be Facebook official is the concept of Facebook stalking. This somewhat worrying art form involves snooping on what another person has been doing using several of the site's features. The ticker that was introduced last year, relationship tracker, and categories of friends have made it easier to see what your partner used to get up to, as well as what they are doing now.

The Facebook ticker is a live feed that allows users to see what others on their friends list are doing on the site. For example, if your friend Mr. Smith posts a status about his day at work, it will feed through your ticker. This may seem harmless enough, but it will also allow you to see when somebody has liked a photo, and other similar activities. If one person sees another click 'like' on a photo that belongs to somebody remotely attractive, this can be quite the argument causer. The ticker did have the potential to cause others to engage in constant page watching, but Facebook's friends categories feature prevented the need for users to do that. By placing a person under the 'close friends' category, and enabling notifications, you can be notified each time they do something. With such features, it is no wonder couples are experiencing Internet-induced rows.

To amplify the problem, Facebook's relationship tracker has made it possible to pry into the relationships of others. As any avid Facebook user will know, any relationship change is marked with the gory details, as well as a heart. This garish display makes it instantly obvious to others what has happened, leading to a morbid ripple of commiserations and gossip.

All of Facebook's features have broken the boundaries of relationships in many respects. Prior to their release, you would never have known if your partner found someone else attractive -- a common occurrence that is often relatively innocent. Now, almost every like, click, and comment has the potential to cause drama. With snooping becoming a common practice, it remains to be seen just how many couples can withstand Facebook's impact on relationship boundaries.

Neil Keifer has extensive experience in matchmaking. He enjoys sharing his tips and insights on various relationship and lifestyle blogs. Visit the www.datingwebsite.com and see their blog for more information.

Image credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ahans/ 


obat maag kronis February 4, 2013 at 2:44 PM  

share words of motivation
One of the most evil than spreading slander are people who like to listen to them. Indeed, there will be no spreading slander if nothing is heard.
may be useful and acceptable. Greetings and I wait behind the visit: D

Harleena Singh February 5, 2013 at 4:39 PM  


The more we stay away from such social networking sites, the better it is for our relationship. Whether you are married or single, you can never know the real person behind the scene, especially on sites like Facebook.

With Facebook Graph Search coming up, things are going to become all the more open, unless you are really careful about what you want to share things with. I guess in the end everything lies in your hands and the choices you make - isn't it?

Thanks for sharing. :)

Anne Lyken-Garner February 6, 2013 at 1:05 PM  

Many times I feel like I want to quit facebook, but with the nature of my job as an author and freelance writer, I think I need to stay to upkeep a social media presence. Facebook is one of my best sites for traffic, so I guess I have to put up with it :-)

Icy BC February 6, 2013 at 3:08 PM  

I have facebook for the same reason as yours, but I am not very active.

And like Harleena said: "in the end everything lies in your hands and the choices you make".

Anne Lyken-Garner February 6, 2013 at 6:53 PM  

Definitely, Icy. We have to make those decisions. The thing is, every time Facebook rolls out changes, it seems to be for the worse (privacy wise) not better. We always have to read so much of their new material to see what they'll do next.

Judy SheldonWalker February 7, 2013 at 2:55 AM  

It is amazing at how much dirty laundry is aired on FB! It has probably been the pivotal point for many arguments and the beginning spot for many relationships. Every once in awhile I find a stalker there.

Anne Lyken-Garner February 7, 2013 at 8:38 AM  

I know what you mean, Judy. An older friend of mine lost his wife of 35 years when she met her first boyfriend on Facebook. Only months later, she found out that the boyfriend was not what she remembered him to be. Big surprise, right?

Self Sagacity February 10, 2013 at 8:53 AM  

I am not sure how those creeps do it, but I guess it could happen. One way I made sure that people don't get so personal is not linking person that I am involved with, but can claim whatever, married, in a relationship, single...etc.

Self Sagacity February 10, 2013 at 8:57 AM  

I can also see your views of the dilemma of "official" announcements as you pointed out too.

Sarah Park February 10, 2013 at 5:05 PM  

Facebook has indeed played a big role in everyone's life. But along with the previliges Facebook offers is the responsibility of doing what is only appropriate and right.

Anne Lyken-Garner is a published author, editor and freelance writer. Her specialities include relationships and confidence building. You can find her inspirational memoir here.
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