Relationship Help Forum: Fidelity Issues

The relationship help forum is a regular element here on the Relationship Blog. I take a letter from a woman with a real relationship crisis (sent to me on a relationship forum elsewhere) and edit all the identifiable details so she can't be identified. I know that highlighting these issues here will help this blog's readers who're facing the same situations in their lives, as I also include my answer to the original letter. 

Today's real life relationship story reminds us of how important it is to stay true to ourselves and what we know is right. Sally's (not her real name) story illustrates how we can sometimes allow relationships to make us second-guess even our own conscience. You can see other relationship help forum stories at this page.

Relationship Help Forum: Cheating Boyfriend

Welcome to another edition of our relationship help forum, where we share real relationship stories from real women (identifiable details are changed). You can see the more real stories here

Dear Anne,

I’m nearly 19 and have been with this boy for 3 years. Lots of people have been telling me that he’s been cheating on me and a lot of other negative things but I never seem to listen.

Lately he’s been acting really oddly. We speak a lot daily but suddenly he’s always hard to reach. He always says he’s with his friends but when I speak to them they always tell me he was never with them.

I’ve started to accuse him lately and am becoming really obsessive. My mom thinks that I should leave him, but I don’t know what to do. He always denies everything.

Relationship Help Forum: Dumped And Pregnant

Another instalment of our regular relationship help forum stories. All of these are real relationship crises being faced by women out there. Of course, the names and identifiable details have all been changed to protect their privacy. You can find other true relationship stories like this one on our forum page. Here's Celia's (not her real name) story.

Hey, my name is Celia and I’m going through a really hard time trying to stop thinking about my ex.

He has hurt me so many times I can’t even count, but I’ve always tried to ignore it or believe his lies because he was my first love. We have been together since 10th grade and we’re both now 20 years old.

I’ve now had to give up on him because he’s meet someone new. Regardless of all the tears I’ve cried and all the nights I spent pacing back and forth to try to understand, I just can’t get through to him.

I’m hurting so badly and right now I’m pregnant. I’m due in a couple of months and this is just really taking a lot out of me. I don’t want to be alone and I sure don’t want to be without him. But all I can do is try to move on, because love shouldn’t hurt.

Relationship Help Forum: Honesty The Best Policy

Here's another instalment of our Relationship Help Forum articles. Today we talk about honesty in relationships and if it's better to state your point of view before the relationship gets too deeply involved. Tammie (not her real name) did so in this true story and wasn't sure it was the right thing to do at the time. Here's her story. You can find the Relationship Help Forum page here, where you'll read other real life stories.

Dear Anne,
I’ve been hanging out with this guy as friends for the past month and a half. He’s always really nice to me and really flirty. Always telling me I’m pretty etc., and is also respectful and mature. I did tell him that I just wanted to be friends from the beginning since at the time I had just broken up with someone. We usually hang out at this party every other weekend since his cousin is the DJ there. We spend most of the night together dancing with the exception of the few times I talked to other guys and got their numbers. I was open about it and he got jealous when I talked to anyone else.

Relationship Help Forum: Bad Relationship

Here's another instalment of our relationship help forum articles. These are true relationship crises faced by real women. We change any recognisable detail and share the story (and the possible solution) with you so that you can be helped if you're in the same situation. You can find more real life relationship crises stories on our Relationship Help Forum page. 

Here's today's story.

Dear Anne

My boyfriend broke up with me earlier this week after 9 months together. I’m finding it really difficult to cope. I keep wanting to call or text him in case he changes his mind. It doesn’t help that we have split up quite a few times in the past and after I have cried and asked for us to try and work things out, we have always got back together pretty quickly.

Relationship Help Forum: Rushing Into Things

This week our Relationship Help Forum story comes from *Alice (not her real name). Her true relationship crises deals with a situation a lot of people can relate to. She mistook a casual, rebound relationship for the real deal and paid for it with a lot of heartache and worry. I have a feeling this relationship was rushed into without much consideration, but my heart goes out to *Alice (all identifiable details have been removed).

You can read more true relationship crises stories on the Relationship Help Forum page.

Relationship help forum: rushing into things

Relationship Help Forum: Love's Sudden Death

This is another addition to our relationship help forum true stories. All personal and identifiable details have been edited. You can find some more true stories on the Relationship Help Forum page. 

This time we feature *Bella (not her real name) and follow her story of how her true love came to a sudden end. Here's her (edited) letter.

Help, Anne!

I met a guy, Dave, in college. Before we met, I didn’t believe in love at first sight. But as soon as I saw him, I knew he was something special. No, it wasn’t a physical attraction, as he is not my ideal type, but it was something else. We started dating immediately and it wasn’t long before he said 'I Love You', and I was happy to repeat those words back. We had several happy months together and talked about getting married.  

Relationship Help Forum: End Of Perfect Relationship

This month's relationship help forum real life relationship crisis comes from Melanie (not her real name). It's describes her agony at having to end a perfect relationship. You can see our other stories from real women (edited to remove any identifiable facts) on the relationship help forum page.

Relationship Help Forum: Thirties Break-Up

Relationship Help Forum: Thirties Break-Up will be added to our regular relationship help forum page on this blog. Today's real-life story features thirty-plus *Kelly (not her real name) and her agony at her relationship falling apart. Somehow it seems - especially for women - twice as difficult to deal with relationship break-ups the older we get. 

The thing is, if you're not happy, relationships can fall  apart at any time of your life. There are so many decent online dating sites nowadays, that no matter what your age, it's possible to meet someone who will love you for you. Please see our relationship forum page to see what it's about and how we edit and handle these real-life relationship crises.  

Relationship Help Forum: Break From Relationship

It's time again for our regular relationship help forum post. We take a real-life relationship crises, change the name and identifiable details of the people involved and post it - and its solution - here. We do this so that others afflicted with the same problems in their relationships can see the advice given and perhaps use it in their own lives. The Relationship Help Blog is all about helping you get the best out of your relationships. Today we look at *Jayne's (not her real name) story about her boyfriend and his decision to take a break from their relationship.

See the rest of the relationship help forum posts on this page. These real stories, taken from a relationship forum run elsewhere, can help you too.

Relationship Help Forum: Test Of Time

The relationship blog runs a regular relationship help forum where we take a real relationship crisis shared by a woman on a forum elsewhere. We edit all identifiable details, then publish the real story here, along with the advice I offered. Today we'll look at *Danielle's (not her real name) story of a young love struggling to stand up to the test of time. The normal response of most women is to hang onto dying love, trying to fan its flames again despite signs of it not working. Sometimes the best thing to do is to leave it alone and walk away. Here's why.

Relationship Forum: Dating His Ex

As readers and subscribers of the Relationship Blog know, the relationship help forum is a regular feature here. I put forward a real-life relationship problem faced by a woman who's written to me. I remove all identifiable details, edit the request, and repost it here along with my answer to her. 

Most of the relationship crises I've featured so far are slightly longer and more detailed than today's post. Nevertheless, today's relationship problem is one faced by so many women out there, I wanted to share it with you. *Judy (not her real name) below was fine with the relationship break-down. She was going through the process of recovery until she found out there was a possibility her ex boyfriend may go back to his ex. This is her story below.

Read the other real-life relationship situations at the relationship help forum page

Relationship help forum: dating his ex

Relationship Help Forum: From Different Cultures

The Relationship Blog runs a relationship help forum. From time to time we publish real stories of women and the genuine problems they face in their relationships. All identifiable details have obviously been changed. These real stories - and the relationship help are published here so that other women who're going through the same situations in their relationships can be offered encouragement and help to move on with their own lives.

The relationship issue below deals with problems that arise from relationships in which the couples are from different backgrounds or culture. This needn't be a problem unless the people involved make it one (as we'll see from *Mariam's  story below).
You can access our other real relationship stories at this page: Relationship help forum.

Relationship help forum: from different cultures

is your true love from another place far away from yours?

Mariam's  (not her real name) story

Relationship Help Forum: Stop-Start Relationship

This Relationship blog runs a regular relationship help forum. The story below is a true one (with all identifiable details edited) taken from the forum run elsewhere. In today's story *Martha (not her real name) is experiencing an extreme case of a stop-start relationship. I know we've all been there. Here's Martha's battle, and the advice I gave her. You can see the other relationship forum stories here.

Relationship help forum: stop-start relationship

Dear Anne, My break up is a bit complicated. I ran away from home when I was a teenager to be with my ex. Things didn’t go very well because we were young and I felt guilty about running away. We were always fighting (I have a very bad temper – more so because I was racked with guilt). I went back home a year later because he broke up with me.

Then a month later, he decided he wanted me back. I took him back despite my parents saying I shouldn’t. Things got very difficult for me at home so I decided to move out and move back in with him again. My parents don’t talk to me anymore. After that it just went downhill from there. Mind you, we had a lot of very good memories, but when we fought it was bad. On our second breakup, I decided to relocate because he was moving out and leaving me with a large apartment I couldn’t afford.

Relationship Help Forum: July

The Relationship blog has been running a relationship help forum, assisting women who've been left in a lurch by the men in their lives.

I share a different story each month (I change the name and situation slightly). I also share my advice to that particular woman. The common thread running though all the stories indicates that us women have tied our self-confidence to the men we're with. This of course, means that when they walk out we feel not only a sense of loss, but a total destruction to our own self-worth. Sometimes this phenomenon can have lasting effects, unfortunately.

It's totally natural to feel beaten down when a relationship falls apart. After all, events like these make us question ourselves. However, one thing we always have to keep in mind is, there doesn't have to be anything wrong with us for someone to want to leave. Here's 'Nancy's' question: